maybe because i'm too nice...

this post is not meant to praise myself..XD
this is just a piece of thought..

i have the feeling that being nice is not bad at all..
but being too nice is horrorible..

i tried to fulfill eveyone's will..
maybe i'm not that good
but i'll try to find someone can help if i can't..

however,i'm still wondering,
"will i be found the best friend of my life?"
someone that i can describe as--
a friend that knows me,,when i'm sad,mad,happy and angry..
a friend that will understand me,,when i said anything..
a friend that will always be with me,,when other people are saying bad things..
a friend that will never talk back to me,,when i did something wrong..
a friend that will always fulfill a promise,,and not say no at the last minute..
a friend that will never say no,,when i ask for help..
a friend that will always advice me,,when i'm wrong..
a friend that will always cares about me,,when i'm not well..
a friend that will always OK,,when i want to go out..
a friend that will always accept me,,as i am

people always said that it is how a friend should be..
i tried to have what 'a friend' should have
until i didn't realize that i've been fooled..
but i always curious why people cannot be 'a friend' to me..
but i always tried to keep it inside me..
because my mom once said
"let others hurt us,but u don't hurt others"

i tried to live with this saying for many years..
and "mom,i can't live with it for long now..
i can't stand to be hurt anymore..i'm sorry.."

maybe i'm too demanding..
keep dreaming coz i'll never find such 'a friend'